Dear Diary 6

On to my next Dear Diary entry. If you missed the Diary of a With It Kid entries, see my aspirations here, puke entry here, and fourth grade entry here,how Anne Frank helped my love life here and the ups and downs of a short lived junior high romance.

Next is an excerpt from eighth grade. The top of the junior high food chain yet still in the throes of hormonal angst. Read on about the short (yet - omg - so important!) relationships of middle graders. Some names have been changed to protect the not so innocent. Middle grade writers take note.

November 17
Howdy! Apparently my diary was made in Texas. I just figured out how long I went out with people. Chase I went out with for 2 months and 2 days. Logan 2 months and 14 days. Mike 1 month 21 days. Todd 3-4 days. That was Dear Diary 5. And Aidan 6-7 days!
Oh yeah, from October 19 to October 25. At the dance I went out with Aidan. The following weekend we went bike riding around his dad's and my neighborhood. You know he could be really sweet. Well, that Thursday he broke up over the phone. Poor Kelly, third time in a row being the dumpee. But at least he had the gonads to break the news himself! He tried and tried to explain why. He said our relationship was like him holding a chocolate cake. He liked the cake, but he was always afraid he'd drop it and ruin it. I was crying when I was talking to him and you know what he said before I hung up - I love you! A couple of times! I go, Yeah, sure. How could he say that after he broke up! Even the next day I go to him - Do you still love me? BOLD girl! He goes, Yeah! We still talk a lot so we're still good friends. I guess I like Ryan or Todd again. I don't know though. I guess I miss liking Aidan or something. I think he likes Wendy now. 4th hour Mike said, "I wish Aidan still liked you instead of a slut like Winnie." I laughed. Mike is one of my good friends now. But I guess I still like Aidan. I guess I always will. Or not.

This post was way before Forrest Gump's "Life is like a box of chocolates." Aidan you were on to something! A relationship with Kelly is like a teetering chocolate cake!

Now tell me a funny or different way you were dumped, and we'll all compare notes!

Laughter is the Best Medicine

Leigh T. Moore and Lydia Kang are hosting today's funtastical Laughter is the Best Medicine Blogfest. Check their blogs for a others participating, and your Monday is going to feel like a freakin' Saturday night!

Here are my attempts at humor for you today.

JOKE:
Have you seen the movie Constipated?
It never came out.
(My kids love that one!)

Fave funny books to check out: Picture Book - Guess Again by Mac Barnett Middle Grade: The Strange Case of Origami Yoda by Tom Angleberger Adult: Any book by Chelsea Handler
What funny books do you recommend?

Today's Twitter Game is #quirksnperksofawriter Play along with us!

Tomorrow I'll be Chris Phillips' guest for Music to Make Write To. Be sure to check out my picks! One is the funniest music video by this band. Here is their second funniest video. (Sidenote: I own a lavender I heart Davey Grolton shirt that the screaming fans are wearing in the video. And my family likes to say Saul Goode for kicks. Plus if this song is on in the car, we all cross our hands in front of our face at the end like in the video...)
LONG ROAD to RUIN by Foo Fighters

Chelsea Lately

Book signing + champagne + laughter + stand up = FUN

Yesterday my friend Sue and I went to Chicago to see the quick-witted Chelsea Handler. Chelsea has two shows on E! - Chelsea Lately and After Lately. If you haven't seen her on TV, she is blunt, inappropriate, but funny as heck! Chelsea is also a best-selling author, and we attended a book signing for her latest, Lies that Chelsea Handler Told Me which is cowritten by Chelsea's family and coworkers. I'm sure it will be filled with crazy stories about this crazy girl.

Here's Chelsea at Macy's signing. She signed 500 books including ours! She looks exactly like she does on TV and shares the same dry sense of humor with her fans.

After the signing, we went to her standup show which also featured comedians Brad Wollack, Heather McDonald, and Josh Wolf from Chelsea Lately. Sue and I laughed and laughed. We both decided Heather and Josh were the funniest of the night.

Here's a clip from her popular show on E! with the very funny Will Ferrell. And for Lola and Carol click here with her interview with Jared Leto. And speaking of Carol and Jared, I'll be seeing both (plus Erica) at another concert in a few weeks! No blood will be shed like last time.

My top five comedians are Joel McHale, Daniel Tosh, Chelsea Handler, Will Ferrell, and Tina Fey. Who makes you LOL? (Sidenote: My dad thought LOL was "Lots of Love" until recently...)

Want more laughs? Monday is Lydia and Leigh's Laughter is the Best Medicine blogfest! Don't be a fun hater -sign up here!

I Love You More Than...

I hope you all had a fabulous Mother's Day weekend. Mine was busy and wonderful! One of my gifts was a school-made booklet made by my daughter. The class read the book Moss Gown by William H. Hooks and then created their own "I Love You More Than" page. The pages were copied and brought together for a booklet for each mom. I love it!
At the end there is also a Top Ten List on Why I Love My Mom. My daughter's number ten? I love my mom because she is weird! She knows me so well. Do you see what her contribution to the Love book was at the top? I love you more than poetry loves its rhymes. Again, she knows me so well!

Check out these other fun, cute entries in the booklet:
Funny!

Sweet!

The Biebs is everywhere!

Hee!

And I love you more than a blogger loves comments. :)

Do you have any more writerly I love you more thans? Leave in the comments!

Today's Twitter Game hashtag is #badquerytips. See more about it at Laura's blog!

This and That Thursday

BLOGGING

Thanks for all of your great comments on Monday's Dance Off post. It was close, but I beat Anita! I was worried, because I forgot to wear my white glove for the dance. More dance challenges September-December!

Have you seen Heather Kelly's new Twitter Game? She is posting fun writerly hashtags for us to tweet. Yesterday's was #dontwakemeamwriting . Looking forward to the next one! Watch for the next Twittergame hashtag posted on blogs and of course Twitter. If you can't find the game, seek these ladies on Twitter: Heather (@HeatherGKelly), Kris (@KristineAsselin), Laura (@laurapauling),me (@kellypolark), Tina (@tinalaurellee), and Anita (she needs to get her butt on Twitter soon)!

Come play with us!

Oh my heck! You can read the first two chapters of Possession by Elana Johnson on her website! Awesome! And now I'm really anxiously awaiting the book release!
And guess what? Carolina Valdez Miller has an ARC of Possession to give away on her blog! I'm entering by golly, are you? Go to http://www.carolinavaldezmiller.com/ to enter!

READING
I just started reading James Kennedy's The Order of Odd-Fish. Quirky and funny so far just as I figured because James is quite witty, too.

MUSIC
Have you heard of the band Sixx AM? Their hit "Life is Beautiful" was 2008's most played rock song. Motley Crue's bassist Nikki Sixx teamed up with guitarist DJ Ashba and lead singer James Michael for their second album, This is Gonna Hurt which released Tuesday. Nikki also released a book of "photography, music and life" with the same name last month. Singer James Michael had a Q&A on Facebook and I asked him what his favorite band to see live was. His answer: Papa Roach! One of my fave bands to see live! They are so energetic!
Here is Sixx AM's single "Lies of the Beautiful People." Photos from Nikki's book are featured in the video.

It's okay to be different.

Anita vs Kelly Dance Off For Charity!

Today is the day! Earthling Hero author Anita Laydon Miller has challenged me, yes me, to a DANCE OFF! Silly girl. The not so silly part is that the person with the least number of comments that day will put $ away towards a charity! We will continue for five more months starting the first Monday in September (We need dance lessons in the summer...). Then in December, we will give that money to a wonderful charity (to be determined) for the holidays.

So, please make a comment, any comment (snarky is okay) on this post. Of course, please check out Anita's dance HERE
(You may comment on both. We play nice.)
Can you BEAT IT, Anita? :)

ANITA, ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY, ANITA?